Alexander theme park

[marcus]

Here's the latest from RogueClassicism, a proposed Alexander theme park.

It could be brilliant, but is that clanking sound I hear that of a sarissa phalanx turning in its mass grave?

[agesilaos]

Steer clear of the little blonde guy in the bar, he's a buuger when he's pi##ed! Sounds more like a modern museum with an active reconstructive archaeology department rather than a ride based park (thankfully, those off colour remarks about Hephaistion need never be made).

[hiphys]

Generally I hate theme parks: the ones I ever saw were totally artificial. The best one can tell after visiting them is that they are terribly funny...

[marcus]

Steer clear of the little blonde guy in the bar, he's a buuger when he's pi##ed! Sounds more like a modern museum with an active reconstructive archaeology department rather than a ride based park (thankfully, those off colour remarks about Hephaistion need never be made).

Well, it is difficult to know.

The problem is, as soon as the words "theme" and "park" are put together, I get horrible visions of extreme tackiness. One would hope that, if the project goes ahead, it follows more your speculation.

[robbie]

Ha ha... Picture this: Alexander cotton candy, corn dogs shaped like sarrisas! Or fluffy Alexander cuddly toys

Or maybe, from the souvenir shop, Alexander action figures, playsets á la battle of Gaugamela or Issus. Replicas of helmets, armor, belt buckles, coloring books!

How about an Alexander or Darius meal, with an Alexander burger and sarissa-fries, and a soda contained in a dummy wine-cup - if you want the Darius meal, you get the soda in a persian ornate cup ... and for the kids to collect, included in all meals; small action figures of Alexander, Darius, Parmenion, Hephaestion, Philip, Olympias, COLLECT THEM ALL!!

Not to mention the rides - merry go round with Bucephalus!


Probably never happen... and just as well, ha ha

Rob

[marcus]

Ha ha... Picture this: Alexander cotton candy, corn dogs shaped like sarrisas! Or fluffy Alexander cuddly toys

Or maybe, from the souvenir shop, Alexander action figures, playsets á la battle of Gaugamela or Issus. Replicas of helmets, armor, belt buckles, coloring books!

How about an Alexander or Darius meal, with an Alexander burger and sarissa-fries, and a soda contained in a dummy wine-cup - if you want the Darius meal, you get the soda in a persian ornate cup ... and for the kids to collect, included in all meals; small action figures of Alexander, Darius, Parmenion, Hephaestion, Philip, Olympias, COLLECT THEM ALL!!

Not to mention the rides - merry go round with Bucephalus!


Probably never happen... and just as well, ha ha

Rob

The replicas of helmets, etc. might not be so bad - I have an excellent replica kopis, for example - but as for the rest:

[robbie]

I agree, Marcus. I was thinking of picking up the movie (Colin Farrell) helmet replica... it's sure to set me back a few dollars, but hey, you only live twice, right?!

I think it's pretty cool, notwithstanding the fact that it is totally inaccurate. Don't know why they couldn't just have gone with the helmet he wore on the Indian victory issued coins.. That one is way more awesome.

[marcus]

I agree, Marcus. I was thinking of picking up the movie (Colin Farrell) helmet replica... it's sure to set me back a few dollars, but hey, you only live twice, right?!

I think it's pretty cool, notwithstanding the fact that it is totally inaccurate. Don't know why they couldn't just have gone with the helmet he wore on the Indian victory issued coins.. That one is way more awesome.

I'm not sure the helmet in the film is inaccurate, Robbie. I have to admit that I haven't studied it in detail, but I don't recall thinking that it was 'wrong' in any way.

I shall have to have a look at the movie stills and then work out which depiction it's based on.

ATB

[Xenophon]

It is essentially this one, from the so-called "Alexander sarcophagus", with crest and plumage added.....

[robbie]

Yes, Xenophon, it would seem you are right... forgot about that one. Can imagine the crest must have been relatively large.

[Xenophon]

...of course, that doesn't preclude it from being either artist's fantasy, or a deliberate artist's attempt to associate Alexander with the 'attributes' of his claimed ancestor, Heracles...

Like you, I would have preferred to see a 'Phrygian' type helmet as depicted on the 'India' commemoration medallions/coins, and found in the 'Philip' tomb and elsewhere.....

[marcus]

It is essentially this one, from the so-called "Alexander sarcophagus", with crest and plumage added.....

That's what I was thinking, although I hadn't yet had a chance to go and check. Thanks for saving me time!

[hiphys]

I read somewhere that Alexander's helmet of the movie was copied from Alexander's mosaic of Pompeii. In this mosaic Alexander wears no helmet, but one lion head-shaped helmet lies under the hoofs of Alexander's horse. From this model is shaped Alexander's helmet in the first battle of the movie.

[Xenophon]

On the mosaic from Pompeii, there is indeed a helmet depicted loose in the foreground just below the large blank 'worn' area. The helmet is lying on its side and is of 'chalcidian' form, and bronze, with a white horsehair crest. It is quite plain, and assuredly NOT of lion-headed form. It is likely intended to depict the helmet of a Greek mercenary whom Alexander has ridden down, rather than intended to depict Alexander's 'lost' helmet, though the latter is possible.....